there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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