Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
