THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
