We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
