It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
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we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
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You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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