she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
