I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
COCAINE IS GR8
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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