I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
