ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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