I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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