yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
