Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
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