that's an acceptable place to lick
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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