Soap is not a condiment
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize