He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
