So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
