Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
