I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...