Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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