I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize