I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
