I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
