she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
