I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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