4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
