how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
