You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
