honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize