Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(305): View more from Florida

Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.

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(410): View more from Maryland

a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(206): View more from Washington

And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny

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(817): View more from Texas

yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing

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(647): View more from Ontario

hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair

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(765): View more from Indiana

My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic

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(801): View more from Utah

Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing

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