she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
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I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
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Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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