i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
