Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
