btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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