mondays should just be called national damage control day
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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