also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
