yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
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