I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
