what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize