But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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