why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I party with great urgency now.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
