My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
