I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Randomize
