watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
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So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
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I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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