is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
