please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
