from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
