In the future we'll all be gay
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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