Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
