Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I forget how to act sober
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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