we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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